I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.
Got a freakin’ call center in Afghanistan.
I told them I was suicidal….
They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck!

A definition of globalization that I can understand and to which I now can relate:
Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana’s death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk […]

A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place…
Man: What’s the problem officer?
Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.
Man: No sir, I was going 65.
Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80.
(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)
Cop: I’m also going to give you a ticket […]

Today’s question: What in the world is electricity and where does it go after it leaves the toaster?

Here is a simple experiment that will teach you an important electrical lesson: On a cool dry day, scuff your feet along a carpet, then reach your hand into a friend’s mouth and touch one of his dental […]

The teenager who borrows the family car for the night subtracts years from the car and adds them to the parents.
Folks would enjoy us more if we gave as much thought to our own behavior as we do to our neighbor’s.
We all think we are exceptional and are surprised to find ourselves criticized just like […]

Do you fly? Do you listen to the safety spiel? Or do you talk to your traveling companion, read the in-flight magazine or listen to your Walkman?
Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight safety lecture a bit more entertaining in an attempt to get your attention. And, if they aren’t real, they […]